A Little Bit About Me
Jazzakallah khair for looking at my profile.
I’ve probably got a lot to say, but in this world, people have less time to read. So I’ll try to be succinct but please forgive me if it comes across rude or short. I’m pithy at the best of times. So there are two sections: the short, TLDR version and the longer version below it.
I work as a pediatrician الْحَمْدُ لله based in Scotland and am unable to move for both personal and professional reasons for the foreseeable future.
I have been practicing since I was around 10. Well, practicing to the best of my knowledge (we didn’t have google or the internet for easy access to knowledge).
I come from a middle class educated family with humble beginnings and am the youngest of three.
I was previously married for less than a year and that was almost a decade ago. From that bad experience, I am weary of rushing into anything again but also realize I am getting older. I’d love to be a father إِنْ شَاءَ الله and even have considered adopting if I can’t find a suitable sister (or even if I do get married, it is something I’d like to do إِنْ شَاءَ الله).
I hope to hear from you إِنْ شَاءَ الله soon.
وَ السَّلاَمُ عَلَيْكُمْ
I only state the fact I am a divorcé not as a badge of honor, but it seems many people have issues with this fact. I am not proud of it, never thought it would be me, but qadr Allah wa masha fa'ala - there must be hikma in why it happened.
I'd describe myself as generally a fun guy, and like to think I have a good mix of eastern and western values, all the while staying within the boundaries of Islaam. E.g., I pray all 5 prayers alhumdulillah, but have no issues watching TV..
I am a pediatrician based in Scotland (unable to relocate), so please understand that I believe I will be questioned about how I treated my patients on the Day of Judgement, and consequently it means that, some days, things happen at work which mean I have to stay there longer than I want to.
Saying that though, once I'm done at work, it's done - I don't talk about it when I get home, I don't dwell on it. As the Prophet SAWS said - there is a time for this, and a time for that. Work time is work time, family time is family time, and the two are and إِنْ شَاءَ الله will always be separate.
I've learned there is more to life than just work - I don't get that much time off work so I have decided that whatever free time I have, I will use that effectively - e.g., visiting friends on weekends, traveling, having people over for dinner etc etc.
I was married already for a short while (but it was not consummated), but it turned out she had different ideas on everything and so we parted ways.
I am generally a social guy, but I don't tend to open up very quickly and divulge my innermost thoughts and feelings within days or weeks, but will say whatever is on my mind and be quite direct. I dislike pretentiousness and pretentious people, and as such, with me it's pretty much 'what you see is what you get'.
I grew up in a variety of different countries, including muslim ones where all the food (burger joints etc) were all halal, and so am used to different foods - so long as it's halal, I'll try it at least once :).
My exposure to different places etc also means I am not a very 'desi/cultural' kinda guy (that does not mean I am not cultured - there is a difference!). If certain aspects of whatever culture fit into Islaam, then I have no problem with them, but if they don't, they have no place in the family dynamics I desire إِنْ شَاءَ الله . إِنْ شَاءَ الله my spouse will feel the same way too.
I tend to think more logically than emotionally, and this also applies to certain aspects of how I view the faith.
Other interests include movies, photography, travel and food (especially desserts- I have a sweet tooth).
I'm at the stage of my life where I seek understanding and do not have the patience to play games and do not have the patience to play games. Please, no two word messages or the like (if you can't make the effort, then you're taking it too lightly).
So if you're serious, please contact me. If not, best of luck to you إِنْ شَاءَ الله.
What I Am Looking For
I’m looking for somebody who is laid back, a good communicator, practicing (which to me means at least doing your salat and the hijab) and patient as my work can be pretty intense at times. Somebody not into playing games. Somebody who will help me (and me her) towards jannah. Somebody I’d want to spend the rest of my life with here and in the hereafter إِنْ شَاءَ الله.
Tall order? Pipe dreams? Sure feels like it at times.
Khair إِنْ شَاءَ الله. If you’re still reading, kudos for your patience!
Before I describe what I am looking for, let me please describe what I can offer: kindness and consideration of your wills, desires and wishes, honesty, stability, and my own desire to be a decent, patient and understanding husband and father - a happy wife is a happy home. I do not have a 'desi' outlook where the wife is to be stood on or insulted, mocked or ridiculed but rather supported, loved, encouraged and valued.
I am not now and have never been one of those guys who falls in love in one meeting or first sight, but my affection and love grows with time - and once there, expect it to last forever.
As far as what I am looking for, this is a muslimah who observes the hijaab (so if any of you say yes to hijaab, yet have pictures without it, I'm not your guy), understands the importance of Islam to our afterlife and regards each action إِنْ شَاءَ الله with the importance that it may be the deciding action of our place in Eternity - heaven or hell. For example, please do not ignore things simply because 'it's a special occasion' eg uncovering at a mixed wedding simply because it is a wedding.
Family values are a must, as well as wishing to have children and/or help orphans any way we can إِنْ شَاءَ الله.
Also, somebody who إِنْ شَاءَ الله appreciates the difference between culture and religion. Basically the embodiment of what Allah and the Prophet SAWS have told us we should be- including kindness to parents, generous and forgiving to our family etc etc.
Ideally, somebody who is intelligent, understanding, willing to talk things through, honest (i.e. doesn't just say what she thinks I want to hear), articulate ('da' and 'dem' are NOT words, even in text-talk), likes to travel and try new things, looks on positive things, and give me solace on those days where work hasn't gone as I wished.
Origins/ethnicity are not a barrier to me, eg no problems with converts/reverts, but I will say it is nice to have kids who can speak different languages, and would like our kids to be able to do that.
Previous kids are not necessarily a barrier insha'Allah, but ultimately it would depend on how well we got along. I will say however that if you do have (a) kid(s), it would honestly be better that you are close by as opposed to many miles away as that would allow some interaction to see how we would all gel insha'Allah.
As stated above, I was married for a short while previously, and would like to avoid any repeat heartache all around, so instead of jumping in after a quick chat or two, I would like to be able to get to know you better and you me, again staying within the confines of Islamic adhaab. This is why I have stated 'unsure' regarding the timescale i would like to marry in.
Please also note - PLEASE do not be offended if I look at your profile and do not contact you. My previous experience has taught me some hard earned lessons to not be hasty. Perhaps that is a bad thing, perhaps it is good, but it is what it is.
In any of the above cases, if you are interested, please send a message - I will respond إِنْ شَاءَ الله.
PS - if you wish to see my picture, please at least message me. I'm not a piece of meat! :). Also, if you are clearly not what is described as compatible (don't pray regularly, no hijaab, any religious status less than 'religious' etc) then please do not be offended when I reject your request.
No so-called salafis or brehlvis or people who observe the mawlid/786 things please. Trust me, we won't get along.