A Little Bit About Me
Asalamoalaikum and greetings,
So, here we have a 54 year old British born Pakistani male, divorced, with a healthy detachment from most relationships.
Ex-disciple of the Amitabh Bachchan School of love, romance and charm which doesn’t appear to be working anymore. Looks to me like the worlds changed for more self centred material interests than deep fulfilling loving relationships. More selfishness than selfless service it seems, but I hope I’m proved wrong, sooner rather than later. Someone must be out there who I hope understands brokenness and aloneness and will make the perfect partner. Someone not in denial of their true authentic broken self. We all are aren’t we? Some more than others.
So, 3 kids pretty much grown up and doing their own thing these days. Separated in 2013 and divorced 2017. Getting very lonely here and could do with a companion for laughter, fun, madness, seriousness and of course marriage. About to buy a tortoise to care for so there will be ‘3 of us in the marriage’ from the outset, let it be known.
Solid Pedigree Rajput Khokhar Warrior class background (useless boast I know, but you should be aware that I’m willing to kill for the last Cadbury’s twirl in the house, if it gets to that, as we rarely take prisoners, but I guess you’d be the exception, and I’d hand it over out of love, as we expendable old schoolers have been doing thus far, and that’s the solid pedigree bit, just giving it all away, every time).
I’m based in North Manchester and involved with the MOJ in Government (Criminal Law Enforcement). Think Amitabh dangling from a helicopter or jumping off a building, then think of me dangling in front of two computer screens all day long, wanting to jump out of the window!
I enjoy country walks, and only 5 minutes from a very large wonderful park in Europe (Heaton Park), and go for a regular stroll, or sometimes cycle through it. I love old films and old music, and have built a great vinyl collection over the years of old Bollywood music, with some great Lata/ Rafi tracks and more, so I do hope you enjoy your music!
I consider myself a connoisseur of Urdu poetry but seem time constrained to develop it further these days, unfortunately.
Love reading, cooking, cycling, cinema and meditation and socialising (weddings, funerals, birthdays etc). We 50 somethings are a great mix of old & new school which these days seems to be addictions to screens sadly! We were never indoors in our teens and knew half the town in the good old times.
Spirituality, scriptures and prayers are a daily priority. Sufi school of thought, but don’t follow fake sheikhs/peers or other ‘holy men’ as such as it’s all diluted and manipulated these days and I’ve managed to detach from all that nonsense long ago. Fell for it a few times, innocently seeking a spiritual guide, then realised they’re doing Shirk, playing God. I love Rumi, Ghazali and all the Saints of past Islamic history. These days, God alone is my Saviour and the Holy Prophet my fellow wayfarer on the road with me, and I now seek a female companion to compliment the beautiful journey ahead that is life. Not looking for anyone perfect but someone giving it a go, you know? A trier.
I play the dhol and enjoy the odd Bhangra dance once in a while with the tribal members when not throwing spears at each other, and the women aren’t cat fighting lol.
Enjoy Asian cooking and can do a few tasty dishes, lamb karahi, lamb pilau and paaye. Can tussle with broccoli & sprouts too in case vegetarians or vegans want to come aboard!
A gym, swim, sauna goer but would like to go a bit more, God willing. (Read as procrastination for now, but inertia will be conquered soon, once we get past these depressing cold dark days.
Other than that a normal run of the mill northern, working class lad, whose done a bit of inner child work if your familiar with any of that stuff, to get to my real self. Most masks are down, demons have been slayed, some still left to conquer but still working on it.
Never smoked, done drugs, gambled, or drunk alcohol and not likely to start now but still an imperfect, flawed, soul, who is trudging the road of happy destiny with humour and banter and sharing love where it’s wanted, needed or required until my number is up.
Enjoy getting to a Man City game every now and then, a few concerts in the year, a good restaurant and cinema if there’s a great film to see, which is rare atm.
Look forward to meeting you soon and chatting.
Best wishes on your search and keep going.
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What I Am Looking For
I realise at our age (mid 50’s), we’re spinning a few plates and are time constrained yet yearn for companionship in a lawful Islamic manner. A local girl in Manchester or nearby would be ideal or someone willing to join me here.
Nikah is paramount yet if you prefer your own degree of independence with your own children, family responsibilities, then a perfectly workable option could be to meet up during the week or at the weekends or when mutually convenient as a married couple until such time it becomes right to be together on a more permanent basis, in later years. Prizing you apart from your loved ones might be too much and too painful for children or from your work commitments and I recognise such predicaments. We need to adapt to the times & try and develop our thoughts and logistics on this matter for all our sakes to seek a happy medium for all concerned. I need no ones property or money, just loyalty, company and trust in the form of a Muslim wife. A nikah with a slow gradual coming together may be the ideal solution. The other option is however, to just move in with me after marriage, if you aren’t juggling too many responsibilities. Just giving you women some very fair options to help spin another plate without dropping it. Having a husband a few days a week might be better than no partner at all, don’t you think? Like most of you I too have no friends of the opposite sex to chat or have banter with so I am aware how lonely it can get out there. This option makes it perfectly Islamically viable. Companionship yet not in each other’s pockets all the time. These are the strategic options being offered then…. don’t all rush at once.
Part 1 this far has been incredible as you can guess. Full of action, drama, tragedy and romance. It’s been full on.
For the next part I suppose I’m after someone emotionally secure, energetic, vibrant, fun loving, with a curiosity for life and a zest for wonderment. Perhaps even an angry, fiery character whose willing to spar with me on ethics and morality and fight with me for what she truly believes in. Perhaps we can secretly let each other win if our arguments carry any weight. Not destroy each other again and again but honour and respect each other, and admit when we’re wrong, rather than falsely keep our guard up, festering resentment and anger all the time. To honour you as a Muslim woman, and as all women need to be honoured, but you too need to come surrendered for it to work, you know. Don’t come with fear, come from a place of love so I can love you in return.
A soul searching, strong yet flawed introspective soul is needed. Open, honest and transparent, with the ability for free flowing conversation and who can laugh at herself and not be in denial of the reality before her. That we are unknown, disposable cogs in Gods unimaginable epic machinery in this humongous universe. We’re nothing in the end. None of it really matters except for the hereafter. We have our daily struggles and I’d like your help. We are barely eating halal, no one hardly gets up for Tahajjud and Fajr, we’re trying to function in a capitalist system which isn’t working tbh, with corporate greed on the rise and we think we’re great Muslims. We’re in denial tbh.
We’ve just got to do our bit and go. Rules dictate we must figure it out collectively as a husband and wife in this world for it to matter in the next world. No partner and we’ve already fallen foul of the rules of the game and the journey is futile.
So Let Part 2 commence. Let’s marry. Let’s have fun. Let’s go!
Light sabres to the ready then….good luck.
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